The emotional intelligence It is the ability to identify, understand and manage one’s own emotions, in such a way as to have a balanced rhythm of life that facilitates relationships with others, and the focus on goals and objectives without the risk of abandoning them due to momentary crises .
The concept is related to the rise of the science of human relations, which began to emerge strongly in the twentieth century. The expression was popularized only at the end of the century by Daniel Goleman, who considered the functioning of the brain in an alternative way to the known one, with emotional centers long before the rational ones that explain the way in which the human being feels and thinks. In this way, according to Goleman, the emotional center has a much stronger power than is known to influence the overall functioning of the brain.
What does emotional intelligence entail?
The idea of improve emotional intelligence It is not altering a person’s ability to generate emotions, but rather the reaction to them, which often has the same or more impact on daily life than the emotion itself.
In this way, it is said that people with high emotional intelligence do not suffer fewer negative or more positive sensations, but are able to measure each one of them in their proper measure.
In general, there are three qualities that make up good emotional intelligence:
- Identification of emotions. People are able to know what they are feeling at all times and why, and in this way realize when their thinking and behavior is influenced by those sensations.
- Managing emotions. Based on that understanding, they are able to control their impulses or the immediate reactions that the brain seems to ask for, measuring the consequences that they may have when that sudden emotion stops.
- Identify the emotions of others. What they can do for themselves, they are capable of doing with others. In this way, they can recognize the moment when another person is upset for some reason, and in this way relativize the actions they did to that situation.
The people who own these qualitiesThey are usually socially balanced, outgoing, cheerful people who, instead of worrying, see problems as opportunities for growth and improvement.
In addition, as people must frequently face situations where the first impression is important (meeting with partners, job interviews), emotional intelligence is usually a key point in these cases.
Examples of emotional intelligence
Many are the things that have been written regarding emotional intelligence, however there are some guidelines that can serve as examples, linked to these behaviors and ways to improve them. Here is a list of them:
- Personal experiences can be generalized to others, but only up to a point. The individuality of each must be understood.
- Think about the reactions made immediately to emotions, try to interpret them and learn from them.
- It is important to have people with whom you have confidence to express in a concrete way the emotions that you feel.
- Avoid stimulants of certain sensations: usually drugs, caffeine or different drugs can fulfill this role, which is contrary to emotional intelligence.
- The brain often overlaps true emotions with others: people often get angry in order not to express sadness. Really understanding what emotion you are feeling is one of the highest points of emotional intelligence.
- Understand the role of emotions in the body, and do not judge the fact of feeling bad or good as something more than what they really are: transitory emotions.
- Value the triumphs of others, without constantly comparing and drawing conclusions for one’s own life.
- People with high emotional intelligence are capable of accepting the mistakes made and forgiving them, but not with this by stopping learning from what they have done.
- People must also be able to identify their mistakes, not falling into a narcissism whereby they think they do everything well. It’s about finding the balance.
- A space to enhance emotional intelligence in children is play, and especially sport. The exposure to losing that all participants have makes those who end up winning able to clearly measure what those who lose feel. This persists in the exercise of sport in the elderly, and even in situations such as job interviews.